Are we at a point in human nature where reciprocity and social norms are changing?
Mitch Joel‘s recent blog post The Myth Of Reciprocity And The Social Life Of Brands has inspired me to finally write this blog post that I’ve been thinking about for quite some time, ever since I read Robert B. Cialdini‘s book, Influence: The Science of Persuasion , which in my opinion is the Bible of influence and persuasion.
In Dr. Cialdini’s book he outlines reciprocity as one of the six weapons of influence that span all nations and cultures. Reciprocity is as Dr. Cialdini and many other psychologists and students of influence, describe reciprocity as an inherent human need to give back or return a favor that was done for us. The classic example that is always given is that of asking a neighbor to borrow a cup of sugar. The neighbor is obliged to lend you the sugar out of generosity and since the neighbor knows you and probably more importantly, knows where you live, so they can get their cup back, presumably you’ve used the sugar to bake oatmeal raisin cookies (my favorite) or something. The borrower of the sugar in a pinch with an unfinished batch of oatmeal raisin cookie mixture on the kitchen counter turns to her neighbor for help and in turn, feels the need to return the favor at a later date, thus the principle of reciprocation.
They say, human nature doesn’t change, but more and more I see the influence of digital communication changing things, changing us, changing culture and slowly but surely molding the evolution of humanity.
When Twitter was new there was no digital social norm established, following back was the only thing we could do, so mirroring our non-digital norms, we naturally followed. However the reason why I think reciprocity may be changing is that it’s too easy to follow someone back thus the internal pull to respond to our nature to reciprocate is also lower. Now it’s just lending the sugar without the cup.
In the new digital world there’s no skin off your back, to do the lending, of following or (insert any future shiny object action here). Because of this, the value of the cup of sugar drops dramatically, so low in fact that the need, that psychological pull to reciprocate is also low, to the point of non-existent I think. Over the long term, we may evolve into a culture where reciprocation in the digital world becomes devalued.
If you like this type of perspective and deep thinking on persuasion and influence, you should attend the Conversion Conference in NYC, Use PROMO CODE CCE131 for a $200 discount. I’ll be there as well as the eMetrics Summit, where I’ll be speaking about Turning Executives into Analysis Believers on October 21, 2011, Friday 1:10 – 2:00 pm. If you’re attending either conference reach out to me, I’d love to connect personally with readers of my blog.
Image used under Creative Commons from Flickr by JD Hancock
